Q&A with Monty (Another Weekend Quickie)

Rory at ‘A Guy Called Bloke’ runs a “Weekend Quickie” series which poses a series of questions. I thought, why not give it a try last week and I had fun so I’m giving it another go. I also encourage you to check out Rory’s blog for other interesting content and give him a follow.

The 10 Questions from A Guy Called Bloke (& My Answers)

Q1: How effective are willy warmers for keeping the chill out?

Let’s address the elephant in the room — what the heck is a willy warmer? Is this what it sounds like? A penis sweater? Well, if that is the case then I think the premise is all wrong. The whole reason the testicles are hanging outside our body is because they need to be kept cool for healthy swimmers and the penis is out there to give them company. My advice is don’t mess with nature. Now, if I’m wrong about this being a penis sweater, then forgive me for the strange workings of my brain. I couldn’t think of anything else a willy warmer might be.

Q2: Have your ever ignited a bottom breeze?

I’m not going to make the same mistake as in question one. I’ll just say “No”.

Q3: If you have to have one hand tied behind your back for one day a week for the rest of your life which one would it be and why?

My backhand. It’s not that good anyway.

Q4: How many cabbage leaves does it take to turn on the average human?

My first thought is that this question should be about fig leaves vs. cabbage leaves. A single fig leaf does the trick. The smaller the better.

Q5: How old is too old and what is too old anyway?

The answer to this question legally varies around the world, but if anyone is finding the need to ask this question they are most likely too old.

Q6: Are you a bubble wrapper popper?

Yes. If anyone answers no to this question they need to be dissected for science.

Q7: Is it legal to paint a tree in the wild?

This depends on intention and jurisdiction. I painted trees in the wild to mark hiking trails while growing up in Vermont. That was legal. I’ve also painted wild trees (as subjects) which I believe was legal despite not getting consent. This is a tricky one.

Q8: Why is the color red used to describe love and passion?

Let’s take a look at the other choices by way of the rainbow: ROYGBIV

Red is the color of blood and associated with the heart. Makes sense for love.

Orange is the color of fire. Not a bad alternative to red for passion but better suited for the angry type.

Yellow is the sun. Too hot for human’s to handle.

Green is lusciously alive. I could see it being an alternative for love, but perhaps more of a maternal, mother earthy love.

Blue is the sky. Too unobtainable for those of us that can’t fly.

Indigo is just a fancy word for the color in-between blue and purple. It’s too indecisive.

Violet is just purple, let’s face it. If our heart is turning purple it’s lacking oxygen and we’re in trouble.

So there you have it, red is for love/passion because the rest of the rainbow just doesn’t work as well.

Q9: How many banned books have you ever read and what were they?

My guess is I’ve read some books that were previously or later banned at some point by someone (people are stupid and do stupid things), but I don’t know any specifics. But while we are on the topic, I loved the book Fahrenheit 451.

Q10: What is the most unusual drink you have ever drunk when sober?

Probably snake blood (the red one) or snake gall bladder (the green one) which used to be served when ordering snake in restaurants in China. They came in red and blue and were a shot mixed with rice wine of some sort. Not recommended.

Bonus Question: Who said ‘Oh man, what are you doing with a gun in space?’ and who were they talking to?

Once again I’ve no clue on the real answer here. Obviously this person is speaking to someone in space that has a gun, but that is seen as “abnormal” so it can’t be something from Star Wars or other typical Sci-Fi worlds. Although I could see this is possibly the Doctor from Dr. Who speaking sarcastically to some stupid human character that brought a gun through time and space. That’s my best guess. Do we ever find out the correct answers for these or are we supposed to do our own research?

Thanks again to Rory for the questions. This was fun.

Be well,

Monty

Published by Monty Vern

Work-in-Progress personal blogger, author & illustrator, and fallible human being.

7 Comments

  1. Kathleen says:
    April 3, 2022 at 11:12 am

    Enjoyable

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  2. aguycalledbloke says:
    April 3, 2022 at 2:30 pm

    Hey Monty some very calculated answers in there indeed.

    1998 Armageddon film was where the quote came from, in the Uk and other countries it can illegal to paint on wild trees if not a government official, cabbage was considered an aphrodisiac and an early competitor to Viagra, Fahrenheit 451 l agree was an excellent film, snake blood gave me an upset stomach for days back in the 90’s.

    Well done indeed for tackling this week’s strange 🙂

    Ps Yes WW are indeed sweaters and if worn wrong true sweaters too 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Monty Vern says:
      April 3, 2022 at 2:46 pm

      I consider myself much more educated after your response. Who knew that a Weekend Quickie would be so enlightening! Haha. Thanks for the good time.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. aguycalledbloke says:
        April 3, 2022 at 3:14 pm

        Always a pleasure in the literary sense and not a WW or cabbage sense of course 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Monty Vern says:
        April 3, 2022 at 3:15 pm

        Of course 😉

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Michelle (Boomer Eco Crusader) says:
    April 3, 2022 at 8:42 pm

    LOL I’ve never heard of willy warmers or bottom breezes either. Loved your rainbow answer to the question about red being the colour of love. So true.

    Like

    Reply
    1. Monty Vern says:
      April 3, 2022 at 11:14 pm

      Haha. Thanks Michelle!

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

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